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Thursday, December 13, 2007
"Better The Dalek You Know"
Groan, that was the official DOCTOR WHO site's offering on KYLIE slutting it up with a DALEK. Otherwise there's no real WHO-related news. This Saturday there's a special preview of VOYAGE OF THE DAMNED, it's on BBC1 at 5.55pm (ish) for those lucky enough to be in the UK. That TOM CRUISE rumour I posted a while back seems to have some validity...

Is Tom Cruise playing THE DOCTOR in the movie?

Elsewhere on TV, there's not been much. RUSSELL BRAND made an excellent appearance on HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU? along with an equally impressive CHARLIE BROOKER. You can catch up with clips on the BEEB's YOUTUBE site. On the same night (oh BEEB, with all these guests you're spoiling us!), JERRY "God In Human Form" SEINFELD graced FRIDAY NIGHT WITH JONATHAN ROSS. As expected, his line of questioning was feeble, "Do they have bees in China?" Nice one Ross, you effing C! Jerry was on top form though, incredibly relaxed and, of course, immensely amusing. The first part of the interview is below, you can see the rest from the same 'tuber'.



NOEL FIELDING has been guesting on NEVER MIND THE BUZZCOCKS while BILL BAILEY was gigging and a great replacement he has proved to be. It's really become the AMSTELL & FIELDING SHOW but that is no bad thing. PHIL JUPITUS was wearing a THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS T-Shirt the other week which got me all aroused. It was similar to one of mine - it had a snowman burning money. Oh, the satire! THE MIGHTY BOOSH continues to be most excellent also with a rather sinister CRACK FOX making an eerie impression last week. Shivers!

The Crack Fox, looking semi-normal...

I think you may have gathered, from a previous post, that I disliked THE GOLDEN COMPASS. Well, I've had time to think about it. Now, I loathe it. I used to love NICOLE KIDMAN. Remember her in MOULIN ROUGE!? Yeah, she was good; full of life and had a personality. Now? Now she is a robot. And not one of those cool ones, mind. One of those really shit ones that nobody likes. The film is a mess, with the current trend for too many characters and not enough time plaguing the narrative. I'll be honest, I hadn't a bloody clue what was going on. I thought I'd fallen asleep or the projectionist had missed a reel.

... oh, but how quickly the Crack Fox changes!

The direction was non-existent and why CHRIS "That's right I did American Pie" WEITZ was chosen was the biggest mystery of all. What else? The CGI was, at times, incredibly poor and there is really no excuse for that. It's all ones and zeros man! I did laugh though, at the end. Which clumsily set up the following films stating, matter-of-factly, what needed to be done. My only hope is that the studio think better and sink this turkey now. The box office has spoken.

Keep smiling bitch, 'cos that's all you've got - you wrinkly robot!

What was good about that particular trip to the cinema was the gaspingly-exciting sight that was the poster for TIM BURTON'S THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS IN 3-D! I jumped for joy and it starts tomorrow at CINEWORLD. I won't talk about it now but, suffice to say, it is one of my favourite pieces of work from TIMMY B. The first few minutes of his next film (which, word on the street says, is gonna be glorious. Glorious in an OSCAR way) SWEENEY TODD are available HERE. I haven't watched it 'cos I wanna wait 'til it's on at the cinema. The director has been talking about his next project, ALICE IN WONDERLAND, HERE. Sounds tip-top.

Two of the greatest living directors together. See, sometimes I can be serious.

Speaking of 3D (or REAL D as some call it), is THE HOBBIT to be made this way? See HERE. Filming has just wrapped on the SEX AND THE CITY movie, see HERE. The trailer is up HERE and talk of a sequel has begun already, see HERE. Still on rumours, it looks like THE A-TEAM movie is finally moving along, go HERE. Why? I dunno. Here's pitch for anyone who works for DISNEY. Check out this little guy, he's screaming to be paired up with a wise-cracking cat in the big city who work out their problems through teamwork and frienship:

It's Disney's 53rd animated classic "Jerboa & Kitty" ('Kitty' not pictured)

He's a long-eared Jerboa in case you were wondering, read more about the little bastid HERE. And so to the CDW of the Week Award. Is it WINELIST? Check her out below, is she.. is she????



CHRISSY A?

JUSTIN HAWKINS?
SPEARS?
LENNOX & THURMAN?
Well, I've got to honour WINELIST once again.


Good work, you mad bitch!

Til the next time,
C.

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