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Thursday, May 08, 2008
"That's What I'm Talking About"
What, being an odious prick?

Is he gonna kill her?

I am, of course, referring to LEE who gave a masterclass in affrontary in last night's edition of THE APPRENTICE, but first up some DOCTOR WHO news. Well, it's not actually news. Unlike last year, there will be NO break for EUROVISION. Good stuff but it does mean it'll be on hellishly early (and it's a STEVEN MOFFAT episode too!). So, what exactly was LEE 'talking' about.

"It's my bufday"

Nothing as far as I could tell. I didn't mention it last week but he introduced this mantra (the title of this post) in the boardroom (much to mine and the nation's digust) and it was said at least three times during the latest installment. There was even more of it in THE APPRENTICE: YOU'RE FIRED. That's what I'm talking about? What does that mean anymore? Is it 1995? Is he WILL SMITH?

Aww, bless. Purple must be out this year.

Of course not. He's just a foul~mouthed macho twat with bad skin (ooo, miaow!) who screeches like a Raptor and delivers other great 'lines' like: "We are squinting, we are sweating" and "We nailed the blue cactus." Squinting? Sweating?? Cactus??? He also, at one point, referred to his 'people'. His people? Who are they? You mean there's more illiterate obnoxious London f**k~heads? Anyway, he managed to win and was very complimentary about the LUCINDA and SARA so he ain't quite the C. that he could've been.

Sadly, no abuse for the 'cold' one tonight.

The task was based in Marakesh but his was sidelined by the lengthier than normal boardroom scene but I'll come to that later. Highlights during the task included RAIF and his classic remark that they should be "getting into the local garb." I would have used the word 'fatigues' personally. Oddly, it still looks like he's gonna be the winner. One thing during the task that distracted me, apart from Lucinda's outift, was the amount of high~fiving going on. It's just one step above banging rocks together and, without wanting to sound sexist (here we go), there's something very unattractive about women doing it.

Take two debts into the shower?

There was also Kosher~Gate (raging on as we speak) but I'll leave that hot potato to the proper media. The weasel that is MICHAEL managed to irk yet again admitting he was 100% arrogant and was proud of it. Only 100? That's not what I've come to expect from these f*cknuckles. I want at least 110%, if not more! JENNY did her usual 'snake' act and check out this very scheming expression as she remembers the word 'espionage':

No strings attached.

Before we get to the boardroom, I would like to point out how odd it was to see SR'ALAN toodling about at home. Very odd, it looked like he was doing an ad for one of those debt consolidation companies. Even funnier was this look that Lucinda gave the losers:

I bet she was laughing inside.

And so to the denouement. Where to start? Well, even though it was her birthday (and she put her hand up announcing this), Al fired that daft cow Jenny without a second thought. Woo~hoo. But it wasn't all laughs. No, hold on, it was. Stand up, CLAIRE with her remarkable comments such as "I thought we were like boyfriend/girlfriend" and referring to herself as a 'rottweiler' (I thought pig might have been more apt, personally). Not to be outdone, Al entered into the fray. Claire said "I might not be able to talk the talk" and he retorted "You don't do bad love."

Nice face, rottweiler!

The new double act continued with their banter. She stated, "I don't know what else to say" and he replied, "Thank go for that." Nice. Al persisted with his schtick wanting to pull Michael's trousers down to see if he was Jewish. The 'good Jewish boy' also provided many larfs, not least crossing himself (and incorrectly at that) before he re~entered the boardroom. And was that sweat or tears running down his cheek just before he wasn't fired?

Welcome to attitude city.

Very happy to see uber bee~atch JENNIFER get the boot. Ding dong an' all that. Guffaws ensued on her exit when she couldn't open the door, bless. Still, full marks to the pair of the sacked s~bags for being such good sports on YOU'RE FIRED. But, last word goes to MAGGY M. Check out the clip below:

video

'Til the next time,
C.

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posted by Cameron McEwan at 4:27 pm -
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