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Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Happy B'Day you sultry, yet reclusive, minx!

Kate Bush, yesterday.

Moving on from b'day celebrations to the more pressing matter of television and its rapidly depleting stock. I am, of course, referring to BONEKICKERS. Why am I still watching this? I could be watching THE F WORD (I did on +1 but more of that later) for flips sake. Well, it starred SILAS CARSON who is well known to us geek~a~zoids for his multi roles in STAR WARS as well as DOCTOR WHO. It also featured NINA SOSANYA who appeared in the 2006 episode of the world's greatest 'sci~fi' (I use the term lightly) show, FEAR HER.

A 'tasteful' photo shoot from Hayden Panettiere. Durty S~Bag!

Not only that we got the original CAPTAIN JACK HARKNESS, played by MATT "Not Torn" RIPPY, in it too. Apart from that, the episode had its usual gaffs and ridiculous set pieces featuring firearms. If you saw this fourth episode of the one and only series then you'll know I am referring to the 'snake' in the hotel sequence. Laughable in the extreme, and not just the terrible CG reptile. Stand up the writers who thought of a grown man and woman jumping on a bed to escape the 'beast', use a pillow as defence and then deliver the line: "Get back inside! There's a killer snake on the loose!" whilst hairing it down a corridor.

There's not enough room here to type what I'm thinking...

The acting, as always, was achingly poor and HUGE "Effin'" BOURNEVILLE has already given up. Thankfully, I did hoot with derisive laughter a number of times so it was worth it just for that. BURN "Baby Burn" GORMAN stars next week, can't wait. After that THE F WORD came to an end and it's been a poor series, it's already tired and the 'celebs' they're getting in wouldn't seem out of place on a CHANNEL 5 reality show where the contestants eat dust for three weeks. The only moment of interest came when GORDON "He's Still A Chef, Right?" RAMSAY (the show's presenter for those who don't know) visited his ole stomping ground, IBROX. He used to play for RANGERS FC (that's a soccer reference for all my international - and by that I mean American - readers) and his 'banter' with ALLY "Mc"COIST proved entertaining for about thirty seconds.

Kelsey auditions for The Joker.

COMEDY CONNECTIONS concentrated on YES MININSTER/PRIME MINISTER this week and bloody good it was too though it was a shame there was no footage of HAWTHORNE or EDDINGTON talking about the show. The highlight came as the gang performed a 'sketch' written by MAGGY THATCH - truly winsome stuff. JOHN BARROWMAN made a long awaited return to our televisions with a programme called THE MAKING OF ME where he looked at the roots of his, and I use this word with much hilarity, 'gayness'.

Insert Depp 'shooting two loads' gag here.

Despite my misgivings about another TV show featuring the one man show that is Johnny B, he certainly impressed as a sole reporter (probably 'cos he was talking about himself!) To be honest, I do not really care if people are naturally gay or its something they become - people are what they are; sometimes they change, sometimes they stay the same. To me, sexuality and preference is not important (or even an issue) but to many people it is and that's fine. It's a crazy ole world we're livin' in - let's just try and get along.

Where does the chin end and the neck begin?

JB's argument that sexuality was inherent was certainly strong and our friend (and sometimes enemy) science was used to dazzling (and amusing) effect. The highlight, for sure, was definitely the moments in the documentary when he dipped into his Scottish accent. Brilliant. And what about his BARBIE collection? Impressive! But what does that say about me? I'm more interested in people's accents (inherent or received?) and their toy collections than their sexuality. Guess I'm just getting old. But full marks to the TORCHWOOD frontman for creating an entertaining and enlightening hour.

DRAGON'S DEN returned to form with a prickly installment of highs and lows. And rule breakers! On both sides of the, erm, cash? Rule One in the Den should surely be NOT to invent a product that questions parenting - DUNCAN BANNATYNE does NOT appreciate that. Rule Two could explain to contestants that if they cannot string a coherent sentence, let alone a pitch, together (even when asked direct questions) then get someone else to do it for you. Last week we were present with the ungodly sight of a band perform in the Den and this week we got a fashion show.

Lookin' good Spears, lookin' good...

The girl woman who presented the pitch on her clothing line did a great job and impressed no end with her international sales. But only £700 a month on PR? She didn't get her sums right there - you couldn't buy a full page ad in a local newspaper for that! So full marks and a gold star to PETER JONES, the rule breaker, who stepped in and offered her more money than she asked for. You could see the rest of the Dragon's sitting there thinking I Wish I'd Thought Of That. A heart warming end to a show that's becoming increasingly cynical (possible?). You can read about her and her erotic adventures HERE.

Top Shop reject.

'Til the next time,

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posted by Cameron McEwan at 8:29 am -
  • At 7:17 pm, Blogger Richard said…

    On the subject of Barrowman, have you read the slightly odd rumour that he's been put forward for the role of Captain America. Can't really see him in a big movie to be honest.

  • At 9:17 pm, Blogger Cameron McEwan said…

    Yah, I did see that.

    Very odd, I think he'd be better as Captain Britain.

    But you don't think that Shark Attack 3 was a big film?

  • At 5:50 pm, Blogger james said…

    happy birthday Kate , please don't leave it another half decade or so for new material !

    Have you seen the X-FIles movie yet Cameron ? Saw it this afternoon & for me knocks the Dark Knight to bits , I absolutely loved it . Managed to see it without any spoilers ( amazing for me) . The opening was fantastic , great soundtrack ( something it shares with Batman) , Billy Connelly was a bit of a revelation & Anderson & Duchovny slipped back into their roles so comfortably . So glad i enjoyed it after the fidgety disappointment of DK .

  • At 9:39 am, Blogger Cameron McEwan said…

    Funnily enough I saw THE X~FILES a couple of days ago. Sadly I didn't enjoy it as you did.

    But, then again, I'm not really a fan of the show which does rather beg the questions why I went to see it.

  • At 7:33 pm, Blogger joy said…

    I'm ashamed to admit I saw Shark Attack 3 (even more ashamed to say I *own* SA2, but only because the lead is a big US soap opera star).

    Agreed, Barrowman as Captain America is a little odd. For as much as he's a National Treasure for you guys, outside of Torchwood circles, he's still relatively unknown here. Though, I guess a big break, is a big break.

    Hey, Cameron...Primeval starts on Saturday on BBC-A. I can't remember if you've done a review (tried to google search your entries, but to no avail.). Your thoughts? Yay, or nay? (Mind you, it's already set to series record on my DVR.)

  • At 8:21 pm, Blogger Cameron McEwan said…

    Wow! You own a SHARK ATTACK movie?

    I haven't seen one all the way through, just clips....

    As for PRIMEVAL, I've never actually watched an episode. The snatches I've seen weren't promising but I wouldn't want to put you off watching it.
    Let me know how that goes.

  • At 11:06 pm, Blogger joy said…

    Yes, yes, I know. I *said* I was ashamed of owning Shark Attack 2. It's atrocious, but seriously, how many movies do you own purely for the eye candy.

    Re: Primeval...I will admit to being superbrainwashed by all the commercials. I swear they show at least 3 or 4 - AN HOUR. So, even when I'm FFing through whatever BBC-A show I'm watching, I still see the promos. And when it's not a promo, it's one of those "Behind the scenes" promos to tell me who the main characters are, or what CGI shots they've created.

    BBC-A knows how to pimp the hell out of their shows, dude.

    I'll keep ya posted. :-)

  • At 8:38 am, Blogger Cameron McEwan said…

    Actually, I don't think I do have any 'eye candy' films. *sobs*

    My 'eye candy' would be Miyazaki or Pixar films.

    Yup, I'm that sad.

    Keep me up to date on PRIMEVAL. I don't know anyone that watched so I'll be interested to hear what it's like (from a real person)

  • At 5:45 am, Blogger joy said…

    Figured I'd magnetpost the Primeval review from yesterday...

    Let's just say it's still on my list for further consideration, but that it's quite possible that BBC-A may be misspending their ad budget to promo the heck out of a show that might underwhelm.

    Now, now - contain your shock.

  • At 1:25 pm, Blogger Cameron McEwan said…

    "...the guy who played the chaperone from The Prince & Me?"

    Now, that made me giggle.

    It's weird (for me - a Brit) to think of the BEEB having adverts. It's also odd that PRIMEVAL is on the channel too as it is on ITV (BBC1's biggest rival) over here.

    I look forward to more thoughts.

    Lurved the Duran Duran post by the way. I wanted my hair to be just like John Taylor's when I was a lad.

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