|So out of touch...
|This guy wants a pizza the action...
That's what I
gleamed from this week's tale of weirdos and losers (and that's just the f**knuckles with the money)
- Duncan & Co. either
don't eat pizza or, if they do, they certainly don't 'cook' it. All us normal people know that the blighters
don't cook/microwave evenly
yet these money~mad buffoons
aren't aware of the plight we face every day. Having said that, I haven't had a pizza in some time... hhmmm... pizza...
If you haven't guessed already, I am talking/typing
about DRAGON'S DEN
. Some bloke (who could barely string a sentence together and I seriously thought he'd had a stroke)
had come up with a nifty device for allowing pizzas to be cooked evenly all over. The cash~rich diddy~f**kers (and I include Debby M in this description)
laughed heartily at first 'til
the poor guy revealed he was a widower - that shut the effers
up! So, they eventually talked themselves round to lurvin'
his idea (well, Petey J anyway)
and gave him the dough. Nice work.
PACINO auditions for the new TIMMY B film, The Life Of Tim Burton CHEVY CHASE - Still alive...
Elsewhere on TVland
, the repeats of NEVER MIND THE BUZZCOCKS
continue to outshine the first~runs
of MOCK THE WEEK
, many more LOLs p/s
. The BEEB
claim that Thursdays Are Funny
, apparently, but the new sitcom, THE CUP
, doesn't really provide many of those. It's like the producers couldn't get any proper comics and cast the entire show with peripheral actors who were in one episode of popular shows (I'm really just referring to THE OFFICE here)
. It's well trod in tone and seems five years out of date (at least)
. If you want a comedy about football, go and watch GREGORY'S GIRL
... as is BRENDAN FRASER. Sadly.
Same night, different channel saw the start of a 'new' (and I use the term quite wrongly)
sketch show, THE WRONG DOOR
. Whilst the production values were acceptable and some of the CG
work was particularly good (especially for comedy show on BBC3)
the makers of this programme should
have concentrated more on the actual scripts. Not
from me. The sketches went on too
long and relied far too heavily on hip tunes. I say 'hip' but actually there was only one
song, from VAMPIRE WEEKEND
, that could possibly fall into that category. We were also treated to One More Kiss
from the outstanding BLADE RUNNER
soundtrack as well as the start to Journey Of The Sorcerer
by THE EAGLES
. Better known to us geekoids
as the theme tune to THE HITCHHIKERS GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
SARAH ALEXANDER - Is there anything she isn't in?
To give it credit, there were some
interesting ideas stuck in there; mainly concerning the increasing overlap and blurring between the 'virtual' and 'real' (and I use both terms not really knowing what they mean exactly)
worlds. You know,
that feeling you get when you play too
and you see blocks everywhere. Or, if you're a total
'player', you think about killing and stealing on the street (that's a reference to GTA which, I must confess, I've never played and I'm relying on second~hand info with that particular remark)
. As always with television shows I look for the DOCTOR WHO
factor, and here we got MYANNA BURING
who starred as Scooti
in the OOD
two~parter from 2006 and TOM PRICE
who plays PC Andy
. Yes, I know, I'm a nerdoid
Doesn't he know Harry Potter is about to end?
Turns out to be have been a good watch; nothing new
, just a neat script on familiar territory with a strong cast. Top marks to Mr Warren
on that count. Not to mention some gold stars and a "see me after class"
to KEELEY "The Voice Of Lara Croft" HAWES
for making me forget ASHES TO ASHES (shudders)
. I'll be tuning in again. I 'tuned' in again to HOW NOT TO LIVE YOUR LIFE
and, whilst not completely
terrible, it still isn't that
good. But it gets another chance from me; I think it must be the girl in it...
Lastly, in the world if TV, MAESTRO
chunders on and it's beginning to become less
appealing. Partly because BRADLEY "Still Crazy After All These Years" WALSH
has been booted out - I was genuinely
annoyed/sad to see him go, though he did so with all his trademark (I say 'his', it was in fact Eric Morecambe's)
style. And, is it just me or is GOLDIE
an arrogant F~Bag
, thought so. Now onto the world of 'movies' with THE WACKNESS
, a disparate tale of generational woe from everyone's favourite era, the mid~Nineties. Oh come on, show some
Again, it's another
generational tale demonstrating that, regardless of age, no~one
is happy. A common tale for sure
and the direction~less ending (for the youngster)
was first addressed in the Sixties (perhaps even earlier)
and I was reminded of the 'Youth' at the denouement
of THE PRISONER
as he hitches his way to nowhere, caring little about which way he goes. The youngster in this flick has problems but, due to the actor's good looks and affability, it's hard to reconcile them. He can't get laid (his words, not mine)
One thing I have learnt is that even the most monstrous of ugmo
will find 'love'. And by that, I mean a 'ride'.
He's just too
handsome, rich and articulate to believe that he's some kind of outcast. BEN KINGSLEY
, in a very real and meaningful way, and I'm not just talking/typing
about the outfits he displays during the film. FAMKE JANSSEN
also does a nice line in being a real effed~up bee~atch
. The direction is all soft~focus in a BOYZ II MEN
video kind of way and deftly stages the heat of a Manhattan
, for me, it's all a bit hollow and unoriginal but, due to the likeable performances and interesting characters, it is well worth a watch.
Couples you thought you would never see: Part 1 - Carrey & McGregor Music~wise
, I 'got' the debut from NOAH & THE WHALE
and what a waste of time that 40 minutes (or so)
were. Avoid, it's tedious. Not
tedious and highly interesting is the latest project from DAMON "His Favourite Cereal Is..." ALBARN
- it's MONKEY
with the album Journey To The West
. Although there's a lot of fluff and inbetween tracks that just come off as noise (I'm sure it's appropriate for the show)
, there are some amazing
melodies and sounds to be found in this work. In particular, check out: the achingly
beautiful, The Living Sea
; the grunting 'sounds~like~it's~from~a~Miyazaki~film' Confessions Of A Pig (featuring some brilliantly odd vocals)
; and the could~be~a~single Monkey Bee
. Great stuff.
Couples you were just waiting to see...
'Til the next time,
Labels: Dragon's Den, Journey To The West, Maestro Review, Monkey, Monkey review, Mutual Friends, Mutual Friends review, The Prisoner remake, The Wackness, The Wrong Door, Wackness Review, Wrong Door Review